All These Things It Takes

I try to touch you
in the weak light of dusk
My cells still tingle
yet you pull away…

Too hungry, too tired
too full of food
too much else we need to do

These things they kill me
These things
are killing me every day

I’d like to kiss you
on the slow walk to our place
I feel nervous
I know you’ll turn your cheek
accept a kiss there
but no more on your lips

Too much coffee, or garlic
too dry or too sore
too much else to be done

These things they kill me
These things
Are killing me every day

‘Sweat it out’
I’ve been telling myself
She’ll come around
I’ve been hard-selling myself

I’ve been doing that now
O, I don’t know for how long
Sweating it all out
for so long

O, it kills me
all these things
that it takes
All these things
that I need to survive
but I’ve sweated it all out
and I need to survive

I just need to survive…

[2009]

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Image Credit: https://www.livescience.com/62918-coldest-place-on-earth.html

Listen to my poems on Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/tomalexwrite
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As We Entangle…

In the lush laugh of London
I indulge the urge to walk so freely
Let my mind wander wide
entertain all its distractions
But what I find
is that your presence
hangs so vividly behind my eyes
That if I pause a moment
or check the pulse of my emotions
It’s you… It’s you…
I don’t want to be here
if it means I am without you

Long live the hours that are ours!

In the glowing gadget’s glare
your words vibrate into my world
and from my bed, so far away
you’re preparing for a lonely slumber
And what I find
is that your gravity
has its beautifully fierce grip on me
So, if I take a step from where you are
my feet begin to ache as they’re pulled toward
It’s you… It’s you…
I can’t bear to be here
If it means I am without you

Long live the hours that are ours!

In the rain’s relentless ruining of roads
and December’s constant wish for cold
I’m sure I’m going to slip on ice
fall in love so hard
And what I find
you’re just the right kind
the complimentary soul I’ve been writing about
So, if I let this be what it longs to be
My hands, my head, my heart
they turn towards
It’s you… It’s you…
I can’t entertain the thought of being here
if it means I am without you

Long live the hours that are ours!
Long live the hours
as we entangle these lives of ours…

[2010]

Image credit: http://margaret-durow.com

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Listen to my poems on Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/tomalexwrite
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Dawn

Dawn is naked and alive
pirouetting in the street outside
she is a broad grey sky, endless above

It’s not rain…
just some foggy spray licking windows
a coat the building wears
a metaphor I cannot interpret
All irony is groggily lost on me
yawning with my whole body
struggling with the load of memory
I shoulder daily

Maybe I should stay indoors
get the fire going, the kettle boiling
That armchair won’t sit in itself
those books won’t read themselves…

How easily these stories are told to me
voices pitched and plot unfolding systematically
inspiration distilled onto the pages
the bittersweet feeling as I turn them
with story presenting; story nears its ending
time growls and time swells across all things
I read ‘the doorbell is ringing’
So, I leave the room
to check for the uninvited

There’s no one there
and I return to find…

The kettle has melted on the stove
the fire has spilled onto the carpet
the armchair roars in flames
those flames are toying with the curtains
All my books are burning
the whole house an inferno now
the house is burning down

Standing, cursing, in the sooty street
‘Oh Dawn, what have you done to me?
you have killed all of the trinkets
that I felt expressed my personality
you have released
all of the memories anchored to them
now they are free
and floating ghostly in the morning air

Oh Dawn, you have stripped me bare of all I carried
I’m no longer tethered to anything here
Oh Dawn, I am free to start a new journey
I’ll have to leave in the clothes I’m wearing
Oh Dawn, what have you done to me?
you have set me free to start again…’

[2014]

Photo Credit: https://www.instagram.com/nightwalkermagazine/

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Follow me on Twitter: https://twitter.com/tomalexwrite
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Listen to my poems on Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/tomalexwrite
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Ocean’s Roar

A raining heart, derailed
just north of love
things that must be done
to protect oneself

Despite my expectant warmth
I find you strangely cold
the trick became transparent
the magic quickly old

A remnant moon shines above us
even in this weak glow, it’s obvious
this affair
is going nowhere

You don’t care to ask
anything about me
yet still you scheme on my love

You don’t dare to share
anything with me
yet still you pine for my love

Put the shell up to your ear
is that the ocean’s roar, you hear?
this affair
is going nowhere…

[2020]

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Follow me on Twitter: https://twitter.com/tomalexwrite
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Love on Borrowed Time

Walking the tracks again
with my face to the rain
every step I take in fear
of that ever-nearing train

I cheated death, I cheated truth
and now there is no proof
more than what my accusers say
yet they increase in number
with every passing day

They shout ‘He stole’
well I admit
I may have borrowed some
and I may have lied
when they looked me in the eye
and I may have given them something
to keep quiet

Every step I take in fear
of that ever-nearing train
every sound that I hear
lights a bonfire of panic in my brain

Every insect buzz
could be a rattling in the rails
every splashing duck
could be steam cloud trails

Cheating in love
I don’t deny
my neck it aches, from looking back
at the tracks of my life
down the tracks of my lie
always looking for that train

I’m walking the tracks again
with my face to the rain
every step I take in shame
for that ever-nearing train…

[2007]

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I’m Not Here

Conversations float like dandelion seeds
drifting on some tumble-weed breeze
the words are soft and out of focus
bouncing quietly off hazy walls

Invisible vibrations pass unnoticed
no effect, no eye turned, no ear piqued
was that my name, something I should recognise
or just another wave in this sea of endless ambience

I’m not here
I’m not here at all

I’m back at that table
our legs entwined below the cloth
I’m down on that station platform
my hands holding your head
I’m reclining on that sofa
our bodies charged with static arcing
your begging smile just inches from mine

I’m not seeing
I’m not feeling
anything immediate
I’m not here
No, I’m not here

I’m standing on the train
with your hand sliding towards mine
I’m sitting too close to you
our shoes discreetly clunking
I’m at my desk watching you across the office
your body floating in that summer dress
you’re shooting me that covert smile

I’m not seeing
I’m not feeling
anything around me
I’m not here
I’m not really here

I’m daydreaming of your seductive voice
I’m waiting for your call…

[2015]

Photo credit: A still from Under The Skin (2013)

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Follow me on Twitter: https://twitter.com/tomalexwrite
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Bite The Bullet

The planets above wink down to me
‘It’s now or never’ they’re implying
I feel her hand brush mine
as we’re walking side by side
her house is just around the corner
I’m leaving town tomorrow
it’s now or never…

A deep breath, I take
I breathe deep
stop my walking, suddenly
she stops and turns to face me
it’s now or never
I tilt my head, crack a smile
make a joke, stall a while
and asking if I’m ‘okay?’
she steps one step toward me
it’s now or never…

I take her warm hand in mine
draw a breath deep down
Think of all that could come of this
she looks at our hands still holding
then back up at me
and for a moment
we share a moment…

But I break our gaze
walk her home
hug her perfume divine and close
as I walk away, alone again
I concede, it’s never
now; it’s never…

[2010]

Photo credit: https://www.instagram.com/nightwalkermagazine/

Thanks for reading.

Follow me on Twitter: https://twitter.com/tomalexwrite
Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tomalex.write
Listen to my poems on Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/tomalexwrite
Buy my book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B084DGKFSH/ref=cm_sw_em_r_mt_dp_U_cgKxEbH5PS6C9